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A story

Kendrick sits on the couch in the green room, covered in sweat. It's the last stop on the Yeezus tour. Kendrick has spent the last 2 months traveling across the country with his idol and mentor, Kanye West, who was currently on stage right now. The tour life can be exhausting, and also somewhat lonely. Kendrick hasn't seen or been in contact with Sherane in months, and his young libido was still beating. The road groupies sufficed for the time being, but there was a hole in Kendrick's heart. He needed more. He wanted more. He wanted Kanye. But he didn't know how to tell him. Kanye was married with children; Kendrick wasn't even entirely sure he was bisexual. But after seeing Kanye's interview on Kris Jenner, he thought maybe he had a chance.
Kendrick looked into the mirror and began to cry. He knew that he could never have Kanye. He could never be with Kanye. Hell, he could never rap as well as Kanye. No matter how many syllables Kendrick spit, Kanye always beat him.
All of a sudden, Kendrick jumped a little as he felt strong hands grab his shoulders and start to massage them lightly. Once he recognized the hands as Kanye's, he relaxed and let his mentor take care of him. Before he knew it, trails of kisses were being traced down his neck and collarbone, only being briefly interrupted as Kanye slid Kendrick's shirt off of his chest. Kanye smiled and leaned into the caress.
Kanye's lips moved to Kendrick's ear, "Very nicely done tonight, by the way." he laughed a bit before nibbling on his ear lobe. "I fantasized 'bout this back in Chicago" he whispered seductively into Kendrick's ear. Kendrick's only response was a soft moan as Kanye pulled him back towards him so Kendrick could clearly feel his growing erection pressed against him. "Would you like some Yeezy in your Serato?" Kanye teased as he kissed Kendrick chubby cheeks.
Kendrick grinned and twisted his head so he could reach Ye's lips to kiss him. "How do you say 'fuck me' in Spanish? Me no hablo." they both laughed before they kissed again, softly.
Ye kissed down Kendrick's chest, especially slowing down to pay attention to Kendrick's sensitive nipples. As he sucked gently, he looked at Kendrick's face. The way that he bit his lip and squirmed under Kanye's touch only egged him on further. His hand slipped down to the bulge in Kendrick's jeans and gently started to massage it gently as his mouth still moved slowly downward. As his tongue slid along Kendrick's abdominal muscles, he undid Kendrick's leather jogging pants and helped him to slide them and his pyrex vision boxers down to his ankles so he could more easily kick them off.
Kanye took the head of Kendrick's penis into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it, making Kendrick elicit moans of pleasure to the sensation. "Ye, I know you want this dick..." he breathed as he moved his hips up to try to encourage Kanye to take him in further.
Ye removed his lips from Kendrick's head to lick along his shaft and take his scrotum into his mouth. He gently sucked on one of Kendrick's tesitcles at a time, making sure that he enjoyed the sensation, but that he was teasing him, just a bit. He used his right hand to massage Kendrick's testicles as he again wrapped his lips around the shaft of his long, slender penis. He took as much as he could into his mouth, having not managed to master the art of deepthroating yet, and bobbed his head slowly up and down, savoring Kendrick's salty taste and his every moan. Kanye fed off of Kendrick's pleasure, doing his best to repeat every little thing he did that caused him to moan louder, squirm against the couch, or grip his hair tighter in pleasure.
Kendrick moaned loudly again, panting. "Fuck... Ye, I'm gonna... Fuck, I'm gonna cum..." he exclaimed as his hips bucked, releasing streams of hot, sweet cum into Kanye's welcoming mouth. Kanye did his best to swallow it all, although a few drops dripped from his lips. After swallowing what was in his mouth, he greedily licked up the drops that spilled.
Kendrick panted as Kanye kissed up his chest, more quickly than his earlier decent. His lips pressed against Kendrick's greedily, his own lust having grown from his pleasure derived from Kendrick's orgasm. He pulled away gently from the kiss, smiling down at Kendrick.
"Is it my turn?" he laughed as Kendrick nodded and stretched his neck to plant a kiss on Kanye jaw.
All of a sudden, both Kendrick and Kanye were startled by the sound of something falling in the closet next to them. Out of nowhere, Schoolboy Q falls out of the closet, with his pants down around his ankles and his dick in his hand. Schoolboy had been in the closet masturbating to Ye and Kendrick the entire time. Schoolboy jumped up, screamed “GONORHERRA NIGGA SKEET SKEET” and ran out the door.
Kendrick, Kanye, nor Schoolboy ever spoke of the event again.
submitted by NeededKoalafications to KendrickLamar

ripped from r/darkjokes

Kendrick sits on the couch in the green room, covered in sweat. It's the last stop on the Yeezus tour. Kendrick has spent the last 2 months traveling across the country with his idol and mentor, Kanye West, who was currently on stage right now. The tour life can be exhausting, and also somewhat lonely. Kendrick hasn't seen or been in contact with Sherane in months, and his young libido was still beating. The road groupies sufficed for the time being, but there was a hole in Kendrick's heart. He needed more. He wanted more. He wanted Kanye. But he didn't know how to tell him. Kanye was married with children; Kendrick wasn't even entirely sure he was bisexual. But after seeing Kanye's interview on Kris Jenner, he thought maybe he had a chance.
Kendrick looked into the mirror and began to cry. He knew that he could never have Kanye. He could never be with Kanye. Hell, he could never rap as well as Kanye. No matter how many syllables Kendrick spit, Kanye always beat him.
All of a sudden, Kendrick jumped a little as he felt strong hands grab his shoulders and start to massage them lightly. Once he recognized the hands as Kanye's, he relaxed and let his mentor take care of him. Before he knew it, trails of kisses were being traced down his neck and collarbone, only being briefly interrupted as Kanye slid Kendrick's shirt off of his chest. Kanye smiled and leaned into the caress.
Kanye's lips moved to Kendrick's ear, "Very nicely done tonight, by the way." he laughed a bit before nibbling on his ear lobe. "I fantasized 'bout this back in Chicago" he whispered seductively into Kendrick's ear. Kendrick's only response was a soft moan as Kanye pulled him back towards him so Kendrick could clearly feel his growing erection pressed against him. "Would you like some Yeezy in your Serato?" Kanye teased as he kissed Kendrick chubby cheeks.
Kendrick grinned and twisted his head so he could reach Ye's lips to kiss him. "How do you say 'fuck me' in Spanish? Me no hablo." they both laughed before they kissed again, softly.
Ye kissed down Kendrick's chest, especially slowing down to pay attention to Kendrick's sensitive nipples. As he sucked gently, he looked at Kendrick's face. The way that he bit his lip and squirmed under Kanye's touch only egged him on further. His hand slipped down to the bulge in Kendrick's jeans and gently started to massage it gently as his mouth still moved slowly downward. As his tongue slid along Kendrick's abdominal muscles, he undid Kendrick's leather jogging pants and helped him to slide them and his pyrex vision boxers down to his ankles so he could more easily kick them off.
Kanye took the head of Kendrick's penis into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it, making Kendrick elicit moans of pleasure to the sensation. "Ye, I know you want this dick..." he breathed as he moved his hips up to try to encourage Kanye to take him in further.
Ye removed his lips from Kendrick's head to lick along his shaft and take his scrotum into his mouth. He gently sucked on one of Kendrick's tesitcles at a time, making sure that he enjoyed the sensation, but that he was teasing him, just a bit. He used his right hand to massage Kendrick's testicles as he again wrapped his lips around the shaft of his long, slender penis. He took as much as he could into his mouth, having not managed to master the art of deepthroating yet, and bobbed his head slowly up and down, savoring Kendrick's salty taste and his every moan. Kanye fed off of Kendrick's pleasure, doing his best to repeat every little thing he did that caused him to moan louder, squirm against the couch, or grip his hair tighter in pleasure.
Kendrick moaned loudly again, panting. "Fuck... Ye, I'm gonna... Fuck, I'm gonna cum..." he exclaimed as his hips bucked, releasing streams of hot, sweet cum into Kanye's welcoming mouth. Kanye did his best to swallow it all, although a few drops dripped from his lips. After swallowing what was in his mouth, he greedily licked up the drops that spilled.
Kendrick panted as Kanye kissed up his chest, more quickly than his earlier decent. His lips pressed against Kendrick's greedily, his own lust having grown from his pleasure derived from Kendrick's orgasm. He pulled away gently from the kiss, smiling down at Kendrick.
"Is it my turn?" he laughed as Kendrick nodded and stretched his neck to plant a kiss on Kanye jaw.
All of a sudden, both Kendrick and Kanye were startled by the sound of something falling in the closet next to them. Out of nowhere, Schoolboy Q falls out of the closet, with his pants down around his ankles and his dick in his hand. Schoolboy had been in the closet masturbating to Ye and Kendrick the entire time. Schoolboy jumped up, screamed “GONORHERRA NIGGA SKEET SKEET” and ran out the door.
Kendrick, Kanye, nor Schoolboy ever spoke of the event again.
submitted by Dunevale to copypasta

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